21 things every guy wants to hear

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1. "A 2-carat princess-cut Tiffany diamond set in a platinum band? Ew, who'd want one of those?"

2. "I need you right now."

3. "Wow—that's an orgasm!"

4. "I feel safe when I'm in your arms…except for the worry that you'll crush my spine with your massive biceps."

5. "I really like the way you smell when you sweat."

6. "George Clooney, Brad Pitt, and Matthew McConaughey are fine, I guess....But honestly, those guys aren't exactly my type."

7. "This is the only pair of shoes I'll ever need!"

8. "Oh, you can just leave that toilet seat any ol' way."

9. "God, you’re almost too big."

10. "On second thought, I'll go to Bed Bath and Beyond alone."

12. "Baby, it is sooo funny when you fart like that!"

13. "Yap, yap, yap—can we please just have sex?"

14. "Of course I'll completely support you while you pursue your dream of becoming the world’s first professional fantasy football player."

15. "Is there anything you can't fix?"

16. "The only thing that could make our sex hotter is including my yoga instructor, Debbie."

17. "More bacon, honey?"

18. "My apartment isn’t large enough for this 71-inch plasma TV. Can we keep it at your place?"

19. "A man wearing anything dressier than jeans and a tee shirt is trying too hard."

20. "Valentine's Day is a loathsome hoax dreamed up by greeting card companies and flower mongers eager to make a buck by preying on the insecurities women have about love."

21. "I want to march down the aisle to the theme from Rocky."
I've got two White Russians but we also need some drinks.
- Kanye West

Re: 21 things every guy wants to hear

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17. "More bacon, honey?"
schon waer ich zufrieden
"Das Leben wird zunehmend in unserer Makro-Funktional-Gesellschaft vom natuerlichen Reize entwoehnt; wenn man sich zus. noch eigene Gesetze schafft, denen man sich unterwirft und unverschaemterweise auch anderen dieses abverlangt, wird es zu einer Farce." - Prof. Dr. H. Schneider